Beauty
December is here and I must admit that when I look in the rearview mirror, I have most often approached the season with a strange mix of trepidation, guilt for feeling that way, and angst for a variety of reasons. Trickle in little drops of joy here and there, and you have my general mood for all things Christmas.
I know that I am both not alone, and a poster child for heresy for my Christmas obsessed friends who herald in the season with holiday tunes long before the Thanksgiving meal is on the table.
Last year, the winds began to change its course and come from a different direction and thinking it must be an anomaly, I came into this season with a wonderment of what was to come. Thanksgiving happened to land a full week earlier than most years and for some odd reason, perhaps an elf, I began to hum an errant Christmas carol as I baked in the kitchen. I didn’t feel rushed.
I still disdain all the commercialization but this year, I just didn’t focus on what I didn’t like about the season and instead found myself just enjoying more the air I breathe and less what I find annoying. Ah yes, gratitude is like that.
This year has been a year of extremes, of bottom scraping lows and pinnacle topping highs and yes in that order. The humility one gains as a result of struggle is a continual valuable lesson in my life. I fight so hard to fend off the wagers of war and realize at the conclusion of each battle that my scars have made me resilient, grateful and oh so compassionate. I find the beauty and the beauty finds me.
Absentmindedly, I got into my car yesterday, after a long and productive day and a longer week, and silently I drove toward home. I turned on my ipod and a song popped on with this beautiful violin interlude and all of a sudden, I took a big deep breath and exhaled. And then a sweet smile appeared and the only word I could conjure up was Beauty. It is not in the eye of the beholder as we are told. Beauty is in the hand of the creator and given to us to behold.
True enough that each of us sees this gift in unique ways. I see exquisite beauty in photographic expressions, written words, and in every sunrise and sunset I stop to embrace. I hear it in baby coos and toddler giggles, and “I love you’s” from my adult kids. I feel it when it’s 72 degrees in December and a gentle wisp of air blows across my cheek. It’s truly all around and I suppose it will always be easier to recognize the beauty in the precious sweet moments of life. Much harder to celebrate when the wind again changes direction but therein lies the wisdom of growing older. The sweet taste of beauty is in just being alive to notice the difference and knowing, truly knowing that the wind will usher in a new dawn.
My favorite Christmas carol is Silent Night. It has a simple melody but one that fills to brimming, my cup of warm fuzzies. May the warmth of God’s grace shine down upon you this Christmas season and His love pour into you and yours into the new year.
Elaine
Silent Night
Silent night, holy night,
All is calm, all is bright
Round yon virgin mother and child.
Holy infant, so tender and mild,
Sleep in heavenly peace,
Sleep in heavenly peace.
Silent night, holy night,
Shepherds quake at the sight;
Glories stream from heaven afar,
Heavenly hosts sing Alleluia!
Christ the Savior is born,
Christ the Savior is born!
Silent night, holy night,
Son of God, love’s pure light;
Radiant beams from thy holy face
With the dawn of redeeming grace,
Jesus, Lord, at thy birth,
Jesus, Lord, at thy birth
By Franz Gruber & Joseph Mohr
